I'm in the world of Theatre.

Wow. That was unexpected. So I have been so busy lately that I had completely forgotten I had a blog. In fact, it was only due to my course, currently on blogging and how it is a Zeitgeist form, that I remembered.

To sum up. My internet sucks. My studying is going okay. It would be better but, yeah, you know, no internet to study. Today I am having a rare day where the internet is actually working enough for me to load one of my video lectures. I am very happy about that.

I am also tired and I'm not sure how much of the lecture I'm taking in.

Reasons for being tired: late nights due to rehearsals. Yeah, I'm in another play! During the week of our last run of Equus, I happened to bump into the director of Jurassic Park: The Musical: 3D, the next show that planned to go on at Brisbane Arts Theatre. Due to date changes they lost the actor playing Gennaro, and so I was asked if I wanted to join the cast.

With two and a half weeks to go till open.

Sure! A challenge can be fun and it's Jurassic Park: The Musical: 3D, who could say no?

I have to sing.

I've never been in a musical before. I enjoy singing but it was never something I thought I would have to do in front of a live, sold out, audience for 6 performances. Or, for that matter, sing well.

Last night the show opened. It has been a grueling past few weeks of rehearsals, hurriedly learning lines, cues, blocking, everything. But last night we opened to a success. A whole week before we opened, the tickets sold out for every performances. It was amazing. And the show is amazing. It took a bit to get there, but the whole cast and crew is happy with what we have come up with and are pleased to show it to everybody who was lucky enough to catch a ticket.

Me? I'm just happy that I could learn everything in less than 3 weeks and not to completely stuff up the show. As the lawyer, I die on the toilet, eaten by the T-Rex. It is my absolute favorite part of the show. I love dying on stage. And I will get to do it for 5 more shows!

So, anyway. That is a brief rundown of everything that has kept me busy for the past few months. The shows have been an absolute pleasure to be a part of and I am looking forward to all the other shows I will get to be a part of one day.

Equus at Brisbane Arts Theatre

Earlier in the year I took a day off work to audition for a role in a play at Brisbane Arts Theatre on Petrie Terrace. A few days after the audition I received a call that I was actually cast! Shock of shocks, fantastic news! My first play. So now, two months later and many hours spent rehearsing, we are two weeks away from opening.

Equus.

"Dr. Martin Dysart, a dissatisfied and disaffected psychiatrist, is faced with a unique case when a young man, Alan Strang, is brought to him for treatment. In his efforts to coax Alan out of his shell and treat him, Dr Dysart begins to unravel the complex psychological puzzle of Alan's obsessions. Underneath Alan's complacent manner, Dr Dysart discovers a fervent, passionate, almost religious power that has both the ability to destroy Alan, and perhaps, the save the doctor himself.

English playright Sir Peter Shaffer (1926-2016)'s international hit is a dazzling, complex, and thrilling look at passion, sex, religion, and sanity" (Brisbane Arts Theatre 20016).

With 17 shows, opening the 30th of July to 3rd September, Equus is a show not to be missed. Starring yours truly as a horse and young horseman (role shared between myself and another actor), and a cast of amazing people, it is the best show you will see all year.

Tickets found at Brisbane Arts Theatre website:
http://www.artstheatre.com.au/equus

Who doesn't love a free book?

My poetry compilation Tales From the Moon's Eclipse is currently on sale for free. For the next 4 days you can find it on Amazon. Follow the link below to get it while it's hot!*

Tales From the Moon's Eclipse is a collection of poetry about love, heartache, discovery and dreams. 

Divided into three parts, Tales From the Moon's Eclipse explores simple wonder at the world. Then, taking a trip into first love, it visits bittersweet awakenings and reflections before coming to rest at the marvel of dreams.

https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B01ACS3FNS

*Link is for the Australian Amazon site but the book is free across all countries.

When the World Was Young

A long time ago when the world was young,
A woman was created, beauty bright as the sun.
There was no match for her in all the world,
Not even the stars could compare as they swirled.

Word of her radiance and smile spread around,
It came to the ears of a young Prince under crown.
He thought to himself, I must seek her for a bride,
No one else will do, I must have her by my side.

The Prince set on his way, in a carriage of golden display,
Driven by six white horses that would never turn astray.
He rode the carriage with haste, for he wanted no delay,
He wanted to be the first to meet with her on this day.

The news spread even further, now across the seas,
Whispered in the ears of a young Beggar on his knees.
If there was one thing that would make him feel whole,
He felt it would be her beauty that would patch up his soul.

He set sail at once, spending every penny he owned,
Even those from friends to him they had loaned.
But to her he must go, for in his heart it felt right,
The feelings inside he felt would aid in his flight.

They both travelled far; one to seek the lady's hand,
One from the safety of his home; far from his land.
A Prince on one side, a Beggar on the other,
One with all to lose and the other with nada.

They both met at her door, and eyed each other's clothes,
One dressed as best in dirt, the other in fancy robes.
The Beggar inquired as to the Prince and the Prince replied,
'I am here to seek the maiden inside to be my bride.'

The Beggar looked surprised, 'I am here to see her too,'
He told the Prince, 'Though not for the same reason as you.'
'Hah! She'll never see you,' the Prince said with a sneer,
As he took in the beggar without standing too near.

'A creature such as you she wouldn't let on her floor,'
He said his final words as he strode through the door.
But before it could close, the Beggar hurried through,
Now slightly in doubt that what the Prince spoke was true.

But the lady saw them both, each alone as they should be;
She asked the Prince what his purpose was in her country.
The Prince explained to her why he was there,
As he gazed around the room and sat down in a chair.

He offered her diamonds, and rubies so bright,
If she would only come with him, please be his light.
He promised her a palace, everything she would need;
She said she would think about it before she agreed.

She saw the Beggar next, ushered him into her room,
She didn't seem to care about the dust on his costume.
Now, the Beggar had only meant to once see her face,
But one look was enough to make him forget his place.

He couldn't go away without telling her how he felt,
How his heart, with ease, she had managed to melt.
She asked about his offer, though the Prince's not forgot,
Even though she hadn't really thought about it a whole lot.

The Beggar was different; he had nothing to offer,
At least nothing that came from his empty coffer.
But he could offer her love, a feeling she'd never known,
He could show her how to take it, make it her own.

The Prince's offer was tempting, she couldn't deny,
But the beggar promised her freedom under the sky.
Yet she held her own secret, she was dying inside,
She wouldn't live long to be anyone's bride.

Who could tell what was going on in her mind,
As each man came before her one at a time?
Both men were so sweet, she just couldn't decide,
Which of the two she would chose to be by their side.

As the men grew impatient, and push turned to shove,
She suggested a fight, the winner wins her love.
They each took up their swords for the battle to death,
Preparing for who would breathe their last breath.

The Beggar fought for her love and his opponent even so,
They fought through the winter and the falling snow.
And as the season changed, one of them had to fall,
So now here is the Beggar, the victor, standing so tall.

But alas it was too late; she had died the day before,
The Beggar cried in despair, collapsed on to the floor.
For all that they had done, neither of them would win,
He'd never see his love as the tears rolled down his chin.

Falling to his knees the beggar weeps in his grief,
Heart overturning for the princess that was a thief.
She stole both men's hearts and departed away,
She crept in to the dark he could not keep at bay.

The moon rises high; the stars shine out bright,
The clouds move aside, showering patterns of light.
The beggar gazes up to the stars as they swim,
And there he sees his love; she is smiling down on him.

Peter Van Werkhoven (c) 2013

I Stood Remembering

They all went to war with their hearts so full of song,
Vowing to stand by their mates no matter how long.

They went with thoughts of making their mothers proud.
You did, they did, the poor youth under the shroud.

War is not pleasant, they had to sacrifice much,
Carrying on as their friends fell to death's cool clutch.

They fell in the fields of poppies we now wear
So we remember what happened over there.

Through the disaster some would see the long war through,
Courage was doing the things that they had to do.

They stood together protecting us from harm,
They would not desert a fellow man in arm.

This morning I stood watching the diggers march by,
I remembered the spirits of those that flew high.

They marched with their backs straight and carried salute,
Hands raised to honour those that died in their boots.

We raise these heroes high for their courage that day,
All the men who fought for our land so we could stay.

War is not pretty, but 'needs must' some will say,
If only peace could have come another way.

Peter Van Werkhoven (c) 2016

Death In Space

In space no one can hear you scream. That is what they say and that is what they believe. Who ‘They’ are or were or is or was is not known exactly, only that they say it and they believe it. They say it because in space there is nothing. Nothing that would hear you scream anyway. And even if they could hear, sound does not travel in space, it does nothing at all. You can scream as loud as you want but not even you will hear it. At least, all you will hear is the voice inside your head telling you that you are screaming, but that is not the same.

In space no one can hear you scream. And I believe it. For I am one of the ‘They’ that believe it. And I believe it because as I float through space, mouth open wide and screaming for all that I have, the only thing I can hear is the voice inside me laughing at my unheard scream.

It started when I fell out of the air lock hatch of a 24 Booster League Star Ship. It was an accident of course, no one ever plans on falling out of an air lock hatch, but it happened and there was nothing that could be done about it. As I said, no one hears you scream so they never noticed me gone. They never saw me either because the ship was travelling at warp, so by the time they do end up noticing I will be long dead. Maybe in another time, in another corner of the galaxy in stars they will never see again. It’s sad in a way, my life had just begun and now it was going to be over in another couple of seconds.

I was born on some small back water planet that didn’t even register in the system; I guess that’s why I never knew its real name. We always just called it Home, though it never ever felt like any of us ever belonged. It’s funny, they say one day everybody grows up and leaves home, and that’s exactly what I did. I never looked back once I was on the bus cruiser, I couldn’t have either if I had tried. We were now travelling at such force your face was being pushed into the back of your head and you couldn’t even blink. It was a terrible way to travel, but that’s space busses for you. They aren’t meant to be comfortable, they’re just meant to get you there cheaply.

My mum never saw me leave, she never had a chance to say goodbye. She’ll never know I died. Not that she cared if I lived when I was at Home. I have no idea what she thought, or what she thinks of me. But she will never know that I won’t exist soon, and that disturbs me. Tears don’t flow from my face now; the space I’m floating in is preventing them from flowing somehow in ways I don’t know.

I don’t even focus on the pain; it’s all like a dream. It just doesn’t seem possible, or real, I was never meant to die alone. I have a girl; she was going to be my wife as soon as the ship docked at Sentri. I asked her before I left and we set the date for the day I got back. She’ll be waiting for me at the docks, all dressed up pretty, wearing that little flower clip she always wears for special occasions, her shiny black hair even shinier than normal framing her delicate face, firm lips and clear eyes. We were going to go straight to the chapel we had booked in advance. The thought of her waiting forever tears me up inside even more than the thought of what space is going to do to me in one more second. We would have married before I left but couldn’t afford it, that’s why I took the job, so we would be able to afford the cost when I got back.

The job in question I had taken was Negotiation Expert, meaning I handled the negotiations between species. I made the terms and then present them to each side and get them to agree on it. Every ship normally has one in case they stumble across some new species. Hardly anyone ever wants to fight, and to make sure they don’t end up fighting they push me in front of them to protect them.

This was my first job, actually. Well, first job as a Negotiations Expert. I had had jobs before this one, doing all sorts of things, anything that would pay. The bus took me to Sentri, and I lived there for about ten years or so, the details are fuzzy. That and the 2 year trip I was coming back from makes me 28 now. I met my girl when I was 25, and we just clicked straight away. The first real girl I ever paid any attention too, the first girl I ever asked to be mine.

I remember the first day I met her, now that I thought was a dream. I just didn’t think it was possible for such a beautiful creature to exist. It was just, unimaginable. But even more so was the fact she noticed me, and she actually talked to me instead of the 400 other Information Clerks in the building. To this day I still don’t know how I ended up with her, I made mistake after mistake trying to impress her. But maybe that was why. It was first day at the job and I hadn’t a clue really what to do, but I told her I’d been there for years and knew the system back to front. Almost created a war somehow by some of the buttons I was pressing. Thankfully she actually worked for the government and was able to fix the probl-

The End

Just Another Day in Procrastination.

I am still writing a blog, when I get around to it. Unfortunately there is nothing to say. I'm still writing The Cold Road. I reached 61k words last night and I am approaching the end. I have a few climaxes to reach and then the downward spiral to The End, hopefully this will all be achieved in the next 15k.

What else is new? My interest in poetry has been renewed, somehow, and I potter now and again writing short pieces. Next week I begin studying again and then it will be nonstop studying for the rest of the year. Will I be able to fit writing and editing a book into all that time I won't have? I don't know, but I will try.

As you may have noticed, this whole blog post has been a waste of time. This is what procrastination does to a writer. They write a useless blog post instead of actual, important writing like finishing that chapter they started on last night. Ah well. At least I'm writing, right?

See you on the other side,
-Peter



He lived for a moment

and died for a day.

He took the advice
and flew away.

It took him so far,
he forgot yesterday.

He wound up alone,
for what he couldn't say.

The ground took him in,
when he had nowhere to stay.

His breath blew away
as in the ground he lay.

But his breath will return
in the end come what may.

For he is dead in the moment
but will live the rest of the day.

(c)Peter Van Werkhoven

The Bogeyman in My Basement

Every house has skeletons in the closest and boogeymen in the basement. My house is not so different. We have plenty of skeletons in closets, in wardrobes, under the bed, this house could be a graveyard if we so wished it all to be known. However, what I find more important than the dead secrets that creep around in the dark behind closed doors, is the bogeyman in the basement.

He’s tall, short, fat and skinny. He is aware of all things, but has no idea of the world outside his home. Sometimes when I am alone and I know he is too, I visit him. He is not a nice person; perhaps I should say this now. He has destroyed many lives and gleefully watched as families fade to dust in their despair. He has organised crimes against and beyond humanity, yet has never been touched by the law. He has been examined many times by organisations and they have tried to cure him, but, and here is where both the bogeyman and I agree, mortal man cannot heal what is not ours to heal. He is the bogeyman that lives in everyone’s basement. Not the usual basement you find under a house, but the other basement. The one that is usually out of bounds, no one is allowed entry. The door usually has a big warning sign on it and tape across it.

Yet, when I am alone, and I know he is too, I ignore that sign, that tape, that dank smell coming from his room and pop by to say hello.

He does not usually say much, but I can always tell he is happy to see me. Happy to have a friend visit. He has no special set of china to set out for tea and biscuits; he has no need for food or drink. His appetite for nothing is one of his invading qualities. When you have been in his company for a little while, you also begin to lose interest in food and drink, even though your stomach tells you to eat and drink.

He still does not say much, or anything of a sort, but you always find yourself answering his questions. Questions that you are sure are not your own, and questions so unrepeatable he should never have asked them in the first place. But if you ask him to stop, he will look at you and smile, shake his head as if he does not understand, and, here, for the first time you will hear him verbally speak, ‘I don’t understand. I said nothing. You asked the questions, not me. But please, tell me the answers. Perhaps I can help?’

Of course, I never believe him. I would never have asked those questions to myself. Horrible, horrible things that make you question yourself, family, friends, and your very existence. After a while in his company, however, you begin to answer the questions and this is where things begin to truly go sour.

My bogeyman friend is not a friend. He is cruel and violent, yet he never raises a finger. He is always welcoming me into his home and despairs when I leave. Sometimes when I stand up to go, all I wish is to be out of his home and to never visit again. Yet he is sweet. When all the world fails and leaves you alone, he is there waiting with open arms. I do not want to say friend, for he is not the sort of person I wish to be friends with, maybe more of an acquaintance. But, sadly, one who knows me too well.

Together we sit in his room, with the blinking light overhead, the cold concrete that never warms no matter how long you sit on it. The walls are always so close but you can never touch them when you reach out. They are always just outside of your reach no matter where you stand.

‘Perhaps I can help?’ he asks again. He does not have a powerful voice; it is quiet, and somehow kind, despite appearances. Or not kind, I can never remember. It depends whether I am walking into his room or running away.

His asks his questions again, or convinces you that you asked them, and then you begin to answer the questions, you begin to think of answers to them and repeat them to him so he can give advice. I tell you now, never seek the advice of a bogeyman. The world they live in is built up of only the things he is aware of; he has no idea of the workings of a human soul and mind. He does not understand how the world works and how it should work. His opinions are biased and one-sided. I have said before, the bogeyman is not a nice person.

Yet he is gentle, and there when the world leaves. He waits patiently for you to come and will always be there unless you choose to pay attention to the sign on the door and the tape covering it. In his company, you begin to lose your grasp of the world outside and accept his answers to your questions as ones knowledgeable and acceptable.

Because he is your closest friend, and the door remains out of your reach, you believe him. After all, why would he lie to you? You asked him advice in the first place, if you asked, why should you not accept his words? However, as you accept him, the world outside really does begin to fall away and the people that really do love you lose you as you refuse to accept them. The bogeyman is your real friend, not them. He will not abandon you. This is not something you should believe. There is better company out of the basement.

My friend the bogeyman is not my friend. Not really. And he does not live in the basement; he lives in my head.

I published a new book.

For no other reason than because I wanted to (which is why a lot of authors publish their works) I published a short poetry collection.

Tales From the Moon's Eclipse is a collection of poetry about love, heartache, discovery and dreams.

Divided into three parts, Tales From the Moon's Eclipse explores simple wonder at the world. Then, taking a trip into first love, it visits bittersweet awakenings and reflections before coming to rest at the marvel of dreams.

You can find the compilation on Amazon.com currently only as a paperback, however Kindle is being worked on as we speak and should be up by the end of the weekend.

Tales From The Moon's Eclipse on Amazon.com: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1522996575

Happy New Year, 2016. Farewell, 2015

Happy New Year everybody! All of you, to the people who have been in the New Year for a day, for those just entering the New Year and those of you who are watching it approach on the clock.

Last year... last year in all I think was good. It was so long and so much happened that I struggle to believe it was just one year, yet at the same time I'm surprised at how fast it felt it went. Last year I hit a few of milestones. I turned 18. I survived 1 year at my job. I had my 5th year anniversary on Shelfari. I also, sometime between August and Christmas, passed the 5 year friendship mark with my best friend in the U.S.

Throughout 2015 I began studying acting, I finally stepped out to follow my dream of one day becoming an actor. I found an awesome class and had an amazing teacher who taught me so much and helped me discover the confidence I needed to step out of my shell and begin chasing that dream. I had the extreme pleasure to be an extra in a few short films, and met some amazing people who also helped me so much by giving me advice and encouragement. One of my new year resolutions is to be in more films and improve my acting, work up from just being an extra with non-speaking roles to being in a main part.

As well as starting acting last year I began studying. I started a BA in professional writing and publishing, studies to help me improve in my writing and hopefully help me succeed in becoming a known published author. I have a few years ahead of me yet, already I have learned much from the course and it has caused me to question many things and reflect on a lot of things I probably would never have thought of. All of it, of course, helping me improve my writing. I have mixed thoughts on the course, but I am actually looking forward to finishing it and learning new things.

But while both acting and writing are two things I adore being able to do, the absolute highlight of 2015 happened between the 3rd and 28th of December. Through a year of work I began saving, saving for many things: being able to study, saving with the intent to buy a car, but most importantly saving to visit America. Back in 2010 I met a girl online and I never thought anything would come of it. I live in Australia and she lived in the States. It was completely random how we met, it was on a book site and she detests reading, the site had thousands of people on it yet somehow we ended up in the same superhero fan group. 5 years later she is my best friend. On the 12th of December I got to meet her in person for the first time and it was a feeling that is impossible to put into words.

For 2016 I have many plans. I have a book to finish this year and edit up, I've got a full year of coursework ahead, I want to act in more films, and I want to work on some private resolutions. Like the year before and the years before that, I have no idea what 2016 holds, but I am hoping that it will be an improvement from all the years before. Not because the years before were bad, but hoping for the new year ahead to be worse than the others is just odd. I also hope that the year ahead of you is fantastic.